Kingsport arrests include DUI suspect driving on flats, woman claiming she is protected by "fairies and gnomes"

Rain Smith • Jul 6, 2009 at 12:00 AM

From a woman who claimed she was protected by "fairies and gnomes" to a DUI suspect that thought they were in West Virginia, Kingsport Police worked some unique arrests during the Fourth of July weekend.

Early Friday morning police attempted to speak with a woman sitting in her car at 913 Packing House Road. An incident report from the KPD says the woman, Joan Conant Talbert, 64, had been evicted from apartments in the area and had no reason for being there.

Police say the contents of Talbert's car -- with toiletry items and clothes strewn about -- indicated she was living in the vehicle. The police report says Talbert refused to produce a license, opting instead to display what appeared to be a lease agreement in the window of her vehicle. When asked to hand the paper to the officer, she refused.

According to police, Talbert became verbally abusive and attempted to lock herself in the vehicle. However, since the window was rolled down, the officer reached inside and unlocked the door.

When Talbert was asked to step out of the vehicle she allegedly picked up a bottle and threatened to hit the officer. She was placed in an arm bar, extricated from the car and taken into custody.

The police report says that while Talbert was being walked to the patrol vehicle she kicked the officer's knee, stating, "The fairies and gnomes protect me" and "I am not going with you."

At this point, according to police, "Talbert was taken to the ground due to her combative and resistive nature." Talbert was then transported to Kingsport City Jail and charged with disorderly conduct, resisting stop, frisk and halt and simple assault on a police officer.

In other news, shortly before noon on Friday police were dispatched to a wreck with injuries at Wilcox Drive and Sullivan Street.

According to police, the woman determined to be at fault was "surprised" to learn she was not driving in West Virginia.

Upon arrival at the scene, an officer determined a Toyota Camry driven by Jeannie Kelly, 39, of Myra, Ky., had struck a Saturn. The driver of the Saturn, Melissa Lambert of Kingsport, was transported to Holston Valley Medical Center with a possible leg injury.

Police report that while speaking with Kelly her speech was slurred and eyes were glassy. She was unsteady on her feet, "and at times seemed confused." She also allegedly performed badly on several field sobriety tests.

When asked what medications she was taking Kelly responded 800 mg Ibuprofen and xanax. She also told police she had taken her husband to a clinic, and that he had recently assisted in a vehicle repair at McDonald's. However, she could not tell officers where either business was located.

Kelly was arrested for driving under the influence, reckless aggravated assault and failure to yield. Police transported her to Holston Valley for a blood test to determine what narcotics may have been in her system.

"While at the hospital Mrs. Kelly asked me if I knew any good attorneys in West Virginia," writes the officer in his report. "When I told her we were in Tennessee she appeared surprised."

At around 5 a.m. on July 4, central dispatch advised officers of a drunk driver on Memorial Boulevard. A motorist traveling the road told dispatchers that the vehicle -- a Honda CRV with flat tires -- had turned on John B. Dennis Highway.

An officer in the area saw a black SUV with "very low tires" on the passenger side. The officer also reports that the tires made a very high pitched noise as the vehicle passed him.

Police pulled behind the vehicle, which was swerving and displayed no tags. According to the incident report the driver, Jessica Rhea Lane, 28, of 125 Lancaster Drive, Kingsport, could not find her wallet. Police say it was sitting beside her in the passenger side seat, and once she found the wallet she then struggled to pull out her license.

Lane allegedly did not know she had two flat tires, or that there were no tags on the vehicle. Police report she smelled of alcohol, her eyes were bloodshot and speech was slurred.

According to police, Lane said she had two and a half drinks around 10 p.m., and thought the current time was about 1 a.m.. It was actually 5:15 in the morning.

Police say Lane performed poorly on a series of sobriety tests, was arrested and charged with DUI and violation of registration. Upon arrival at Kingsport City Jail a jailer inventoried Lane's property. They found three pill bottles, one containing Prozac which she had been prescribed.

The police report states another bottle with no label or writing contained 19 pills, which a local pharmacist identified to be, "Valium 10 mg." The police report says an additional two and a half pills which the pharamcist, "advised were .5mg of Klonepin" were also found.

The pills were placed into evidence to be verified by the Tennessee Bureau of Investigation lab, while Lane refused to submit to a blood test. In addition to her previous charges, police added charges of possession of schedule IV drugs and violation of implied consent.

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